Saturday, September 20, 2025

Kimmel to do reboot of the Three Stooges

 

Insider reports claim that Jimmy Kimmel – who has been axed from his late night show thanks to his utterly insensitive remarks concerning the death of Charlie Kirk – is in negotiation to get reinstated.

Not only that, this contract could possibly reemploy Steven Colbert and Fallon, even nutty Seth Meyers in a reboot of some Three Stooges classics.

The network was concerned as to whether Kimmel play the role of Moe, and was he sadistic enough to physically abuse him fellow comedians the way he has verbally abused anyone associated with the Republican Party.

But a review of his previous shows demonstrated Kimmel far exceeded the other two comedians in this regard.

Colbert apparently objected to giving the role of Moe to Kimmel and suggested they toss a coin, until someone pointed out that there are three comedians and a coin only has two sides.

Jon Stewart, never one to miss an opportunity to get attention, agreed to play the role of Shemp, if the network wished to have the program include four stooges and not just three, though network officials seemed to think Stewart lacked talent to play the role of any stooge. Most experts agree – with the exception of Jay Leno, who seems to be kissing the others’ asses – none of the four have been funny in the past, and hope that by beating the crap out of each other, they will gets some chuckles from members of the GOP, who would clearly find that entertaining.

Just to be on the safe side, network officials are expected to bring back the old Vaudeville hook, to drag one or more of the trio if and when they go off script and start ranting and raving about Charlie Kirk again, an unlikely scenario considering how contrite Kimmel became after savaging Kirk the first time.

Still, these three (or four if you count Stewart) are perfectly capable of screwing up a good thing, always desperate to make some kind of political statement rather than actually being funny. Despite their rise to power on late night TV, none of these people have talent or ethics to make their political diarrhea sound funny, unlike Charlie Chaplin, in whose shadow none of these three can compare.

Rumors or not, would any network dare to take a chance with these mental giants? Can they be trusted to do slapstick after so many years of lame political jokes.

Of course, there remains the question of how the heirs of the original Three Stooges might feel seeing such pathetic characters parodying the really great comic acts of the past. They could sue to keep the network from allowing such low-life characters like these to play those roles.

If things don’t work out for Kimmel and company, he and they might take up a profession they are truly adept at: Trash collection. After all these year dolling out the crap they call comedy, those three certainly would know what trash sounds like.

 


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